Pensacola, Florida
Monday October 14th 2019


News of the Weird 12/6/18

By the Editors at Andrews McMeel

Wait, What? Akihiko Kondo, 35, of Tokyo, spent $18,000 on a Nov. 4 wedding ceremony to marry the love of his life, Hatsune Miku—a computer-generated hologram with big eyes and long, turquoise hair. Kondo told Reuters he found Hatsune Miku, who has thousands of fans around the world, singing on the internet. The wedding ceremony included traditions such as the exchange of rings (hers was placed on the finger of a stuffed doll created in her image) and friends and relatives in attendance, although Kondo’s parents did not attend. “I believe the shape of happiness and love is different for each person,” Kondo said.

Compelling Explanations It happens all the time: A vehicle crashes into a building, causing damage and sometimes injury, because brakes don’t function or a driver steps on the wrong pedal. In the case of Keith Rio Cavalier, 28, however, there was more to the story. WLOX reported that Cavalier drove his 1997 Toyota Tacoma into a glass wall at the Harrison County courthouse in Gulfport, Mississippi, on Nov. 10 at around 6 a.m. The building was empty, so there were no injuries, and Cavalier can be clearly seen on surveillance video climbing out of the truck and leaving the scene. When police caught up to him, Cavalier told them he intentionally struck the building in order to report drug paraphernalia had been stolen from him. It will come as no surprise that Cavalier was found to have been driving under the influence and arrested; he was held at the county jail on $25,000 bond.

What Is Fame? Former Toronto Blue Jays star Jose Bautista has another honor to add to his resume, thanks to entomologist Bob Anderson of the Canadian Museum of Nature. On Nov. 22, reported the Associated Press, Anderson named a newly discovered species of beetle after the star third baseman and right fielder. Sicoderus bautistai is a small black weevil found in the Dominican Republic, where Bautista hails from. “I thought what a great way to kind of recognize (Bautista’s) contributions to Blue Jays baseball and to Canadian baseball, really, as a whole,” said Anderson. The scientist has named about 120 weevils over his career.

Picky, Picky A referee in a Women’s Super League soccer match in Manchester City, England, stayed cool at the start of the televised game on Oct. 26 when he realized he’d forgotten his coin for the kickoff coin toss. Thinking quickly, David McNamara had the captains of the Manchester City and Reading teams play “Rock, Paper, Scissors” instead. But the Football Association, soccer’s governing body in England, was unamused, and on Nov. 26, McNamara began a 21-day suspension after accepting a charge of “not acting in the best interests of the game,” according to the BBC. An FA refereeing manager said: “He should have been more prepared. … It’s very unprofessional.”

Crime Report Suspected car prowler Isaiah John Gellatly, 31, of Vancouver, Washington, was going about his business late on Nov. 19 when Happy Valley police were called, according to Fox12 News. Responding officers found Gellatly lying fully reclined in the driver’s seat of a Honda Accord matching the suspect vehicle’s description. Suddenly Gellatly sat up and sped away, leading to a pursuit and the use of spike strips. As his ability to control the car decreased, police said, Gellatly opened his door to flee, but forgot to put the Honda in park, so it rolled alongside him as he ran. Eventually he tried to run in front of it, as the car hit a tree, a building—and Gellatly, breaking one of his legs. Suspected stolen items found in the car included a tennis racket, a Ping-Pong paddle and a Texas Instruments calculator, begging the question: Was it worth a broken leg?